He is born, even to me.....

I know that it has been a long time since I wrote, not that I had nothing to say; but just that I needed to find exactly how to say it. As I prepared for Christmas, as I went through Advent, I kept thinking that this Christmas I wanted it to be different.  First, I decided it was not going to be a commercial event like I have done in other years. How to scale down in my gift giving without my family and friends thinking that I was just cheap.
I, also, wanted it to be different in my heart.  To allow Jesus, the babe of Bethlehem, to be manifested in a new and different way in my life. So I prayed. I prayed that I wanted to change.  You see if you have followed this blog at all, you might surmised that I have a lot of flaws.  So I prayed that I could get rid of all or at least some of these flaws by Christmas. I know God can do all things, even the impossible, so why not make me what I wanted to be, a better person one that would fall into sin less quickly and get out of it far more quickly.  I prayed and I prayed.  I knew that things could and would be different.
And then it happened. On December 23 as I knelt in prayer at St Gregory's, as I admired how beautiful the church looked for Christmas, as I contemplated our manger and saw the only thing missing was the Christ-child.  I heard the voice in my heart. 'Why do you continue to pray as you if you were flawed? Do you not remember that you are created in My image? I do not create anything that is flawed, you are exactly as I want you to be.'
Mind blowing, isn't it? I now understand that some of the things I wanted to get rid of, are the things that make me realized how dependant I truly am on God. I am no better then St Paul that prayed that the thorn on 'his side' might be taken away. My thorn or thorns are part of me. When I battle "my demons"( as society tends to call it now) I realize that through the power and grace of God I will win the battle.
I now realize that I don't necessarily need a physical, mental change; I just need to fight the battle and arm myself with the right spiritual change.
Yes, more is coming....The new year starts tomorrow so a new blog.

Happy New Year!!!

"Go into deeper waters..."

For those that have been following me for a while, you know that I have my ups and downs; my moments of total clarity of where I am suppose to be going and most of the time feeling that I am drifting without direction and possibly heading towards certain disaster.

Since my trip to Spain, I feel more focused and know that God is leading me, I just have to be obedient and follow. Well that is evident in all parts of my life, even the physical and that is the one that I have the most difficulty in accepting at times because that is where I am challenged the most.

Well you know I trained for a marathon and then several and a whole bunch of half marathons> I lost a substantial amount of weight and then gained some of it back. But I knew that I was on the right path. I have to digress though. Five years ago when I started training for the first marathon, I never thought I would consider myself a marathoner, but I am. Well just last year when some friends, Debbie and Terry, started doing triathlons, I thought how cool is that. But they are better trained, a lot younger and better risk takers than I am. I do have a mountain bike though, one that had sat with its tires deflated for the last 2 years in my entry way. I would think I will try riding my bike, see how it feels after so many years. Well about 3 or 4 weeks ago, I decided to put air in the tires and went out for a ride. It felt good, so what do I do ? I decide to look into a duathlon race. I find one on Labor Day weekend locally so I decide to train for it.

Well train for it the best I could without having any real direction. My only direction and certainty was that if God allowed me to sign up and start it He would get me through it. So I went out, rode my bike, several times and even rode the 10 miles I knew the race would be. I was tired, I could not take a step after getting off the bike. Well 2 weeks ago I signed up for the race. Last week I ran some during my training during the week with Nancy. Boy was I under trained.

Finally couple days before the race , I told a few people that I was doing it. Also a priest in his sermon talked about how Jesus always called his disciples to go into deeper waters, to drop their nets in places where they were not accustomed to fish and how the catch was bigger then they ever hoped for. One of my revelational moments, this was 'my going into the deep' moment. I had to trust and fully experienced it.

I woke up the morning of the race, sweating and fearful and as I rolled over in bed, I thouhgt if I had not told a few people that I was going to do this , I could easily stay in bed a few more hours. I did get dressed and went into uncharted territories, I had a bike, that I was not sure what to do with and a lot of unanswered questions and doubts. Just before I started Debbie and Terry spotted me in the crowd. Really they are good friends, but yesterday God used them as guideposts in this unchartered moment of my life. The race started and they encouraged me at the crutical times, at the begining and end of my first run. Through transition and several times during the part of the bicycle race. When I got off the bike after 10 miles and I thought I could not take another step, they were there yelling encouragements at me, I was 2/3 done with the race. As I continued one step in front of the other, I came to finally realize that yes all things are possible because God is the one providing my strength. I saw them at the end of the first loop in the 3 miles route and Debbie said it was official I would be a duathlete by the end of the race. I did finish it and as I looked at my numbers, I saw that I did really good considering it was my first one.

More importantl was that although I was really racing against myself, it was one of the best experiences that I have had. I got a couple comments of people telling me, wow you have a big smile on your face. Today when I saw the official race pictures, I saw that I did have a big smile on my face. Just goes to show you that all things are possible, you just have to trust and you really have to accept the help and encouragement of the people that God puts in your life.

I know I could have done the race with out Debbie and Terry being there or without the calls from Barbara or Nancy; but I am thankful that each of them played a part to get me to the finish line. Thanks, you all have a special place in my heart.

Oh by the way, that was not my last race, thanks guys.....

Procrastinator? Or maybe I just don't like change...

On the feast of Santiago, as I prayed I realized that there was no better day to release this blog then today. The picture I took on the beach, and as I pondered on it realized that sometimes we see God and the beauy in our lives as we go through the storms in our lives. So hang on and see the beauty in the storm.

At times in my life, I hesitate and don't jump into situations that, although good for me, require change in my life. Wow, that was a vague statement and not even one that made much sense. I could talk generalities here and confuse you and even myself or I could be specific and possibly scare you and specifically myself. I have decided to speak specifics.

In my trek through northern Spain, I felt that God was saying many things to me ,some I have shared, and some that I even now, hold in my heart and ponder their meaning. One of the things that I shared, at least I think I shared, was the feeling that I would return to Spain and live there and even live there long enough to die there. Mind you, not a morbid thought, just one that I felt deeply in my heart as I walked. So I came back and said ok many years from now , this will happen and I will go. As the weeks have passed, I keep thinking why is it that it should happen many years in the future. None of us are guaranteed a certain time here, so why not act like it is just to be in the future and not so far away. I have started to pray, to contemplate and to think about a move. A move to Spain, a move into the unknown. I am not going to take a blind leap, but I have started my investigation of all that it entails to make that move.

The funny part is that I am at peace with this decision. There are many unknowns still in the equation, many questions unanswered. But I feel that the message coming from God is, He will show me the way, He will provide the answers. Ok I may not be leaving right away, or it might be sooner that I expected. But I know that I have continued the path, the walk that I started in Spain. I am scared because I don't like change, I am excited because I know that I am not alone. You will be with me , in my thoughts in my prayers. If you thought the blogs have been interesting, just imagine when I start writing about my adventures in Spain. And by then they will be bilingual. Ok lets not get carried away. I have not started packing, I have just started to think about what I should throw away. It is funny even my mom out of the blue says, you know if I go to Spain, I might not want to come back....that would eliminate a big obstacle to the move. You know this blog is not done with, so to be continued......

Buen Camino.

Honesty.....really?

I know it has been a while since I wrote but, not that it is an excuse, life sometimes gets in the way. It has now been several months since my trip to Spain, but it still seems to be playing a part in my life and daily decisions that I make. One of the things that I wrote that I had learned or was trying to incorporate into my life was, that I wanted to be an honest man.

I was going to look back to see if I had written about in detail, but since I enjoy the story, and I feel that every time I think of it I get something out of it. I will retell it here. On the sixth or seventh day of our walk, we had reached like a fork on the path. To the left it was clearly marked, up ahead it was not as clear; but this group of kids we had been following were on that path. I stood there trying to decide, what to do, which way to go. As I am standing there, I see one of the adults that was with the kids coming towards us. He says to follow them , that this is a straighter path, that the one to the left curves and makes us cross the highway up ahead. So I thank him and start to walk with him towards the kids on this new path. We are walking and I find out he is one of their teachers. As we walk we keep seeing these fields of a planted crop on either sides of the path. I ask what it is, he tells me he has no idea. The kids are giving me their thoughts on what it could be. So I say in my sarcastic tone, what type of a teacher are you? You don't know what your national crop is? I tell him , if you came to America and you were walking with me,even if I didn't know exactly what it was I would make something up. I would tell you what it was even if I didn't know for sure. His response, I consider myself An Honest Man.

Just think I my ego deflated at that moment. As I still think of it, I justified my response,that Americans exaggerate or blatantly lie when not wanted to face the truth or when we don't want to hurt some one's feelings, a white lie, or if we don't want to face or ignorance on a specific subject. I labeled it Americans, but maybe it was me that was insecure or just a liar.

We parted ways that day and the next day we saw him, now dubbed the honest teacher, and his group of kids as they walked. We chatted and they said they would see us in Santiago. We kept on walking but that honesty issue stayed in the back of my mind. When we got to Santiago, we did see everyone, everyone except that honest teacher. On our last day there, we went to the pilgrim's Mass and I sat in the second row, well I see these teenagers being brought around the altar and I am thinking why can they get up close and here we are further back. The Mass starts and as the priests process in , one of them is the honest teacher. i was blown away, not only was he a honest man, he was a honest priest. I felt foolish with the comments I had made, but wanted to see him after Mass. I tracked him down , and of course he remembered me, the guy that had said all Americans were liars. I gave him the last rosary I had and told him that I would email him so I could send rosaries to the kids. We had exchanged emails, but I thought sure never talk to him again. I did write him weeks after and made the promise of the rosaries again. He now said that he was going to take a group of kids to the World Youth Day in Madrid where there would be an encounter with the Pope. He wanted 50 rosaries. I am happy to say that rosaries were made and delivered to his parish in Spain.

At least this once I was honest, I did keep my word. So if in your dealings with me I might say something upsets you or might seem off, please excuse me my filters are still not completely in place, I might try to be more honest, but still don't know when to just keep my mouth shut.The pictures are of the priest and his group that will travel to see the Pope. And yes I am also trying to be an honest man.

Peace, and Buen Camino.

STOP(or at least slow down) and smell the roses..

I can not believe it,it has been 2 months since I started el camino in Spain. What I had planned, prayed and thought about for a whole year,is back in my personal history. Have I started to forget what I experienced, what I had learned during that very special time? I came home vowing to continue to live in the presence of God, seeking His Will in my life; but the realities of work, of the business of life started to in cringed and erode that peace within my being.

So now I take time to explore, to rethink , to rediscover what was special during that journey. First, I have to once again seek the quietness in my heart , to be able to listen to God whispering to me. Second, I have to recommit to actively searching for the good in every circumstance I am faced with. Third, I have to find the extraordinary in even the most ordinary things in my life.

I made the commitment to myself as I left Santiago that that was really the start of the true spiritual journey that I was on. And so I reaffirm that in my life today, as I walk through this part of my life I want to seek and feel the presence of God in my everyday life. I strive to my that honest man I spoke about and so I will continue to do the battle with the dragons in my life.

I am once,again, reminded that the adventure is only now starting , it is with great expectations that I stop or at least slow down and experience life to the fullest. Live in peace,live in joy. Buen camino, my fellow pelegrino.

Recap? Maybe it just the beginning....

It is almost 48 hours since I got back home, and approximately 72 hours since I finished el camino by entering the Cathedral in Santiago de Compostela. If I closed my eyes and open my heart I am still overwhelmed by the feeling I felt at that moment. That last day on the trail was a very emotional day. We walked approximately 19 km from our room to the city. We passed the airport where the fence that kept on us on the path was covered with thousands of crosses made out of sticks ,rods, whatever the pilgrims had carried or found on the ground. We walked on and started the second climb of the day as we entered the Monte de Gozo, called that because it is the first place on el camino where the pelegrino could look and see the steeples of the cathedral far off in the distance. Now there is a monument built there in honor of Blessed Pope John Paul the Great and St Francis of Assisi. I was in tears as I neared that pinnacle thinking of what great men had walked this path before me, and here I was in the same place.

As I started to go down , I saw some gypsies to the side of the path and so I went to see what they were selling. To make a short story of a long encounter they made me a leather bracelet on the spot and a wired pilgrim to take with me through out my future travels. As I bid them goodbye, one of them says you have some time? or are you in a rush. My better instinct told me tell him you are rushed but I said no, we are not in a rush. So he told me to follow another path off the main one, and that it would lead me to 2 iron pilgrims, as I looked to where they looked I would be able to see the steeples of the church. And so I climbed even further, and reached the spot. I felt like I was the first pelegrino to have still the far off church. I said a prayer of thanksgiving and place one of my hand made rosaries on the huge statutes fingers.

And then we started to climb down. I entered the city and felt lost. There were signs , the shell was still on the pavement at times, but humanity was quicly approaching . I had entered an university city where everyone was in a rush. Here I was a pelegrino, with my stick in hand feeling lost and vulnerable. But I had seen the steeple, I knew I was going in the correct general direction. As we got closer to the church we entered the old city and the souvenir shops assaulted our senses. But we continued, turned into smaller passages, and the saw the side of the cathedral. I was here, as I started to get closer I heard bagpipes, there was someone actually playing the bagpipes outside when we walked by, and then I turned into the main plaza.

There it was before me , bigger then life, it encompassed all of my visual field. It was gigantic, I climbed the steps and entered into the coolness of the main church. It was dark, and it felt cold, but I was here. I had made it. With the help of Barbara and countless others on the path. With all of your prayers, I was here. Tears streamed down my face, I went to the altar, I said a prayer. I climbed the steps behind the altar where I could give Santiago the customary hug. I remember closing my eyes as I laid my face on his mantle and felt the cold of the silver and the hardness of the stones; and all I could think was THANK YOU. I climbed down and then went to the place where his crypt is. I knelt and there I prayed for a long time. I prayed for each one of you as well as for all those intentions I had carried in my heart during the last 9 days , over the past year. I got up went to the Blessed Sacrament Chapel and said a prayer of thanksgiving. I was done as a pilgrim, I had become a tourist now. I did get my Compostela, that is the certificate the church issues when you have completed at least 100 km of el camino.

What lessons did I learn or relearn? First, that for me, God speaks to me in the silence of my heart. I have to shut up to be able to listen to Him. Second, that I have to listen to His Words so I can walk the correct path for my life. Third, that I want to be an honest man. Fourth, that there are guideposts to help us along the path, that we are not to go off the path or we are liable to get hurt or lost. Fifth, that el camino has shells or arrows to guide the pelegrino, but in my life God is even more inventive on how He guides me.Sixth, that there is nothing that I should be afraid of,and seventh that I am very much loved by God and those around me.

You know I am back home, but some say that El Camino really starts when you leave Santaigo. I will be on this new path the rest of my life. I know that I will be back to Spain, to el camino. And I hope that if you see me looking lost and disoriented you might just point me to the right path. As you might guess, my blogs form this trip are not really over yet. I have in my heart certain instances that I want to share with you and some of those lessons that I experienced. I wish you a buen camino because we are all in some journey and we all are seekers in this life.

Peace and Joy. Happy Easter.

It is like running a marathon...

You know whem you have trained for a marathon and you are getting to the end and you think yes,I can make it the training and effort was worth it. Well that is how is how I feel tonight. Like my friend,Barbara, says walking the camino might be like childbirth, after it is over you remember only the good parts. I can see what she means now because now, I only see the good.

Today was a relatively easy day. it was mostly level ground and the weather still cool.We traveled 18 km and it only took us about 6 hours. we got to the hotel early about 3:00 pm , so had time to wash some clothes, rest , and drink a couple of glasses of sidra from the tap.

Still I feel that the magic of el camino is not only in the quiet times where God can speak to your heart, but the people He places in your path. I have met some wonderful people, some crazier people the me, and some real characters that I have formed stories around like I usually do when I do ny training on the beach.

I have lots of stories, but the most important is the change in my heart. I miss you all, I hope to personally shared some of them with you. And I want you to know that as I give Santiago my hug tomorrow, your arms will be around him also, because I carry each of you in my heart.

Buen Camino.

Is it 'Groundhog Day' the movie?

It is the end of day 7 on El Camino and we are about 37 km away from Santiago, traveled about 20 km today. The weather started off cool and cloudy by the end of the day it was very sunny and warm. I had to strip down to my undershirt. I am not sure if it the weariness associated from the long walks but it seems I am a hamster in one of those exercise balls, no matter how far or how slow or fast i go it seems like I am just going in circles, or better yet up and then down and then up again. Today I kept thinking about the parable that Jesus said about the Pharisee and tax collector that both went to the temple to pray. And the Pharisee stood there and his prayer basically was how great he was and how thankful he was that he wasn't like the tax collector. The tax collector on the other hand just knelt face down saying be merciful to me a sinner. Well you know who left justified. For km after km today , i could only repeat Jesus Christ, Son of the Living God, be merciful to me, a sinner. It was really revealed to me what a humbling experience it is to be at the total mercy of God. It has been an eye opening experience to see, once again, the greatness of God and the nothingness of man. Got a pamphlet at a church and it was called Do the camino, I open it and it says why look at your past failures? It can only lead to new temptations. God has forgiven you, leave the old man behind. Wild, right?

On a lighter note, the food is still fantastic and the people unbelievable. In the middle of no where today there was a stand with water, coffee, fruit, walnuts, jam cake and chestnuts. I grabhed the chestnuts. Also went to Mass at Arzua and there was an american,Julie, we had met her in Madrid the day we arrived. Also the Spanish guys I have talked about. We are all scheduled to arrive in Santiago on Wednesday. The priest at the Mass called all the pilgrims to the front at the end and gave us the special pilgrim's blessing. It was neat because we all knew each other. Well my friends , it almost midnight and tomorrow is another long day. Buen Camino.

Started to enter the Enchanted Forest

Can you believe it, it has been a week since I left Florida, and this part of the journey will be over in a blink of an eye. Today I walked about 20 km and it did cool down finally to where a light jacket was needed for most of the day. Traveled from Portomarin to Lestedo. Staying at the restored rectory of the old church. Since it is early in the season we have the whole place to ourselves.

Galicians believe that their forests are enchanted because the trees look like the ones in the movies, where you can see faces and body parts in their trunks. And so as we entered I realize that today would be a day to battle the demons and giants in my life. I think that no matter how perfect your life is, there is always a struggle within yourself, to choose good and evil. Today I once again looked at this struggle and thought about and fought so good gold overcome evil.

Today was also a day that it mattered not where we walked but who we encountered on that walk. It was not a day to see the beauty with my eyes but to experience the beauty and goodness in the people I walked with and encountered throughout the day.
I met a band of five Spanish friends and Dana, the seeker of Truth, from Australia.

In the end I realized that yes we do the battle , yes we have to fight the demons in our lives, but we don't have to do it by ourselves. Sometimes God will place those people in our lives to help us fight , to lift our spirits and be our Sancho Panza.

Buen camino fellow pelegrino.

Buen Camino fellow pelegrino.

I know God has a sense of humor....

Went from Sarria to Portomarin today, that is about 25 km took us about 8 hours because there is still record heat here. In past years it has snowed at this time of year, but lucky us we are sweating at close to 30 C. Today we reached a milestone or should I say km-stone. We made it to 100 km from Santiago, actually now about 88 km away. The terrain was definitely a challenge , with either an uphill climb or downhill ; seldom was it even.
Part of the uphill was over foot wide granite steps with water rushing on either side. Well this is where God's sense of humor comes in. When we had successfully traversed this section, I was happy with myself with the accomplishment. Well, it was now time to go downhill. No, no more steps, only a couple of inches of mud. And this is a dry part of the year. I'm thinking ok God yes I will even walk through this mud for you.

But isn't this like our real life, sometimes when we think ok I have either had enough or enough already... He gets you through it.

Tonight it seems cooler, and the stars are incredible, it is truly the milky way. A lot of you know that I did the Goofy Race and a Half Challenge, and you call me goofy. After I get back just call me Santiago because this if not for the spiritual, is a lot crazier. Buen camino, my friends.

Silence is golden....

Today we walked from Tricastela to Sarria , a distance of maybe 20 some km or like 11 or 12 miles. We picked the high road because it was moré scenic , less traveled and slihhtly shorter. Beautiful vistas were st every córner but the most impressive thing of today's trip was the silence. In the chirping of the birds, the babbling of the brooks, the breeze through the trees the sound of a cow bell, there was a especial silence and solitude on today's walk. I felt in my heart that in this quiet , in this solitude is where I can feel and come to understand and appreciate God's presence in my life. I think that is why the world is so messed up right now. Too much busyness, too much audio visual stimulationprevents us from seeing, from heading the whisper of God in our lives. So this journey for me now becomes moré personal. It is not a time to network, to do the things I would normally do. The time comes when the journey not only takes me when step closer to Santiago, but it also takes me closer to once encountering my God in the silence if my heart

Is this like Vegas? What is said in 'el camino' stays there, I think not....

Today might be Day 4 or 5 but yesterday completed the first full day of walking towards Santiago. It was a hard day, maybe the altitudes, lack of sleeping at Home or climbing hills for whatever reason it was hard. We left the village of Ociebero. Imagine a village of hobbits or smurfs and you are there, except the houses were not mushrooms. It also a place where legend says the Holy Grail was kept for many years and where a miracle with holy communion occurred and that is still there. A very holy , enchanted place indeed. And then we started to climb and climb. We reach the pass of San Roque. Then we went down , and then up and up until we reached the highest point in Galicia , meters mean nothing to me so I won't bore you with the numbers see Facebook for the picture. After we had a recovery drink called Aquarius with Alex it was off to a Hamlet where this is an old lady that hears you come and make crepes and as you pass she has them there for you , her name is Carmen . I gave her a rosary and she gave me a special blessing. The scenery is beautiful and it all males you feel how insignificant you could really be if you are not focused on , like me, following the Will of God. There is a certain smell to this walk for this day it seemed it was of simple cow manure. More to come. Buen camino.

I think the 'camino' will be easier ....

Ok it is day 2 , in Madrid. We left the hotel at 830 in the morning and got back just a while back after 9 pm. I think the actual walk will be easier. Woke up to a beautiful cool morning. Barbara got a Starbucks and I stopped at a little bar/ quick mart and got a cafe con leche and pastries. Then off to the royal palace again, stopped at several churches on the way, the museum of ham and then to Mass to celebrate Barbara's birthday. It was in the crypt church under cathedral, what an experience. Then off walking around to Plaza Mayor where I was looking for hot chocolate and churros. Too late for them so had a beer instead, good thing because I had bought some fresh pork rinds. Off to some more spectacular churches then bought meringue and a rufta, something like chocolate mousse. Yes great lunch. Then we did a trial run on the metro to train station for tomorrow morning. Came back went to KM zero where all roads start in Madrid. Then off to another church, it was closed because it is Monday so took the Metro back from Puerta de Toledo.

In the course of the day visited 7 or 8 churches and almost got run over twice. I forget that there are cars on the road too.

Ended the day at Plaza Mayor for paella and a pitcher of sangria. And no I did not walk in traffic after that. Had marzipan instead of cake.

And now I am off to bed. Buen camino.
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Getting closer .....

I am in Madrid well actually finished the first day here. Although the plane was delayed did make it into Madrid at about 10:40 am. We found that there was going to be Mass at the terminal we were at, at 100pm. We waited around, tired but made it to Mass. Then we took the bus into town. We got dropped off about 10 minutes from our hotel. Well rolling my 42 pound luggage and Barbara rolling her 44 pounds, it seemed like alot more and a lot longer distance. We found the hotel right next to Gran Via which is the main drag here.

Got to the room and realized that my telephone was not working internationally, nor any of my apps. Decided not to panic , got washed up and started to sight see. Went to the puerta del sol, el Cortes ingles department store and then just walked. Had roasted chestnuts from a street vendor, went to the royal palace, the plaza major where we tried fresh potato chips. It was starting to rain. Well we got alot of rain but had fabada asturiana. Barbara tried blood sausage for the first time and this killer cheese tart. I had natural sidra and a glass of champagne at the hotel. Got my phone working, that is why I can write here too.

Whoa did I tell you this is only day one and we are jet lagged. I can see why we are tired. Well until the next time, buen camino.

The adventure is about to begin...

Here I am sitting and waiting. I have been packed for about a week now and the day is finally here when I am about to embark on this anticipated journey. I leave in a few hours, and then I will be in Spain as I awake, a few hours earlier then you, tomorrow morning.

I am full of excitement and anticipation. What this journey holds for me only time will tell but I still feel that it will be life changing. As I learn patience in the next few hours, of waiting at airports and for planes to leave and arrive, I know that that will only be the first of many experiences and lessons to be learned , relearned and then shared with all of you.

I just want to remind you that any time you see a link on facebook there is a new blog on here. the facebook picture has been changed to on e of el camino, and it will be changed back when I am back in the states. That way you will know of my arrival. For those following the blog you will get an alert when there is a new one.

I take all of you in my heart and know that I will think of you often when I am thinking of nothing at all on my walk. I look forward to sharing it with you on here as well as sharing my pictures when I get back. I will pray for you as I hope that you will keep me in your thoughts.

Buen Camino.

El Camino

It is often said that the start of 'El Camino' is the first step you take out of your doorway. I have come to realize that every training session this past year , every marathon , every half marathon was leading up to the day that I first step on that sacred passage in Spain.

Sacred you might ask? Why? I think it is sacred because of the countless people that for whatever reasons have done that walk during the past centuries. A walk that has been shaped and carved into the ground by believers, nonbelievers, any one brave enough and maybe ignorant enough to start the journey. A journey that will give answers to your questions, or possibly just give you sore feet and a weariness to your body.

During this past year as I trained physically I was just building endurance and speed. Well for 'el camino' you need endurance but necessarily speed. These past few weeks I have started to learn to slow my pace. To be open to my environment not only in the physical realm but the spiritual as well. Today as I walked , with a stick in hand I am happy to report that my pace slowed to almost a 19 minute mile, for those that know me you know how difficult that has to have been,I am a fast walker.

Am I excited? yes, but it is a type of peaceful expectation. This is not a vacation, this is part of my spiritual journey and growth. Know that I will be praying for each of you on this journey. I hope that where ever you are in your walk, may it bring you closer to what you seek. Buen camino.

This is a test to see if I can post from my iPhone. This is only a test so I can use this feature while on vacation.

A time to contemplate, a time to reevaluate.....

Can you feel it in the air? The times they are a changing again. I know it is easier when you are up north and the miserable, cold, wet winter is gnawing at you, and you begin to sense the change. the days are getting longer, the days are not as bleak. It is a time of renewal, a time of rebirth. Spring is upon us and lent is just about to begin.

What a perfect time , to sit back, recalculate , reevaluate our journey , this pilgrimage we are all on. I have decided to take the time, to set myself apart as best as I can to see where I am headed. Is it where I want to be and go, or am I really being open to the guidance and promptings of God through His Holy Spirit. I have at times during this past year felt that I am at a cross roads , a pivotal point in my life, and I feel that I am quickly approaching one now.

So I take time , to look , to listen to pray and to be open. In less then a month. I start the walk of St James, the camino in northern Spain. know it will be life changing because even if there is no major revelation, I will have many stories to tell and share with you all. Until then, until I start writing from Spain, I will be silent. I will sit and listen to the gentle whisper , the stirrings in my heart.

Peace to all.

Even when you think no one is watching...

I woke up this morning and realized what a miracle it was just to wake up, feeling good and pain free. As I prayed and pondered my life this morning , I came to realize how each of our lives is intertwined with the others around us. No matter how insignificant your day to day activities seem to be, someone is watching your actions. So be careful,act accordingly. Be positive because a negative attitude will affect you and those around you in a negative way.

You might think why worry about my actions. I only have to worry about myself. But you know in your heart that it is not the truth. We are not created to be just an individual living isolated. As humans we long to interact with others, to be accepted by others. So we have to cultivate that, build a relationship with God, find fulfillment and then you can be a positive influence on others.

We are heading into the third month of the new year. I shared at the beginning of the tear about resolutions, about where each of us were heading. some of you shared your resolutions with me. I now invite you to let me know how you are doing. What are your successes, where are your struggles? We are all in this together, so let me help if you need a little push.

Think about it, pray and about it, and be positive.

It's all in the mind....

Well, I am finally writing the blog a few of you have been waiting for. Have you ever felt as a failure? Has it ever happen to you that you fail and that one thing plagues your whole outlook for a long time. Each decision, each action you sort of measure against what you considered was your defeat?

Three times, that I can remember, in my life have a felt as a complete failure. The first was when my marriage failed, the second was the first time I was fired from a job, and the last was when I was not able to complete the Goofy Challenge at Disney last year in 2010.

Since that day, it seems like everything I did I, myself, kept comparing to what I could do and what I would do if I failed again. Alot of things have happened, negative as well as alot of positive, and already as most of you know, I did complete the Disney Marathon and had a personal PR to boot.

I guess as I write this, I do not want to concentrate on the success that I accomplished, but more on all that I missed during this past year. I learned that all things are possible with God's help. I also learned that you have to enjoy the journey along the way. You can't just plan on the end because if you don't make it to that end, then you really have not enjoyed the journey.

So my goal now is to really enjoy the journey. Smile more often and definitely not take each day so seriously. So don't forget to smile and love today, this might be it.

A New Year, A New Start...

Yes, it was last year since you heard from me last. I wanted to write on this first day of the year, not only to commit myself on some resolutions that I have set; but , also, to encourage you to set some resolutions and then share them with me so that I can help you and hold you accountable as the year progresses.

My church, St Gregory's, publishes this poem every year at this time and I felt it was appropriate to add it to this blog.
"He came to my desk with a quivering lip:
the lesson was done;
'Dear Teacher, I need a new page', he said,
'I have spoiled this one.'
I took the old page, torn and blotted,
and gave him a new one, all unspotted,
And into his sad eyes smiled:
'Do better now, my child.'

I came to the throne with a trembling heart;
The year's work was done;
'Dear Father, I want a new year', I said,
'I have spoiled this one',
He took the old year, torn and blotted,
And gave me a new one , all unspotted,
And into my sad eyes smiled;
'Do better now, my child!"

Every New Year's morning , I get up and walk with Barbara for a few miles and then I wait for the sunrise, to see the new dawn on the year. Well, today as I walked the weather was iffy, it was cloudy, and very breezy. In the mental dilemma I felt God saying to 'Trust in Him alone'. I realize that no matter what if I saw the sunrise or if it was covered by the clouds the sun would still rise, just as sure as God was present and guiding me in my life. Well as you can see from the pictures, the sunrise was spectacular. But a lesson was still learned in my morning walk.

Without further delay, my 2011 resolutions are as follows: 1) do the 100 day challenge,2) do a half marathon in less then 3 hours; 3) continue to lose weight and reach my goal weight; 4) continue to write the novel:5) do "El Camino"; 6) with help of God, conquer one vice(or sin) at a time; 7) reconcile with brother and his family.

I know some of these seem easy and some nearly impossible; but I have set my goals, I have started my quest to reach them and I know as the year continues to unfold, I will struggle , and I will conquer. I thank you for being my guideposts at time in my life. I look forward to continuing to share this adventure. Like I said I hope that you will be willing to share some of your goals, some of your resolutions so that we can help each other in our journeys. Share them as comments here or on facebook. I look forward to this year with you.